Strides for Success

Tag: Thoughts

  • Using Your Thoughts to Put Better Habits on Autopilot in Your Riding

    How often have you felt overwhelmed about remembering and doing all of the things when it comes to your riding? Perhaps you find yourself looking at more experienced riders and wondering “How do they do it?”. Maybe you feel at a loss because “As soon as I start with something different, it all falls apart.”.  Or for you it could just be “I just can’t remember to do all of the things at the same time!!!”. This is a very real part of the riding journey for all riders. It’s a phase you have to go through if you want to improve and succeed as a ‘rider’.

    Take a deep breath, because you’re definitely not alone. In fact, feeling overwhelmed, especially when you’re still learning all of the things is a natural part of the riding journey. Every single rider—yes, even those more experienced riders you admire—has faced these exact frustrations.

    One of the key differences between struggling riders and those who appear effortlessly successful comes down to one key thing: putting better habits on autopilot – and your thoughts can help you do just that…

    Why Thoughts Matters (Not Just in the Saddle!)

    Here’s the truth: your thoughts and how you think about your riding significantly influences how you ride. Your thoughts produce your emotions, which result in the actions you take.  And over time, those actions become habits! Which means putting better habits on autopilot is mental as much as it’s physical.

    And improving your thoughts isn’t simply about positive thinking; it’s about your automatic responses and mental habits, especially when things don’t go exactly as planned.

    Unfortunately, when you become stressed or feel overwhelmed while riding, your brain will naturally resort back to autopilot – which means that if you have not set up good ‘mental’ habits, the result is probably not what you want.

    If your habits in general are not actively helping you through these stressful situations, things will begin to go sideways – fast! However, when you begin to intentionally create helpful mental habits, put better habits on autopilot, chances are that you’ll be much more successful in handling the challenges that come up. Both mentally and physically.

    And, here’s something to get excited about, you don’t have to wait until you’re sitting on your horse to start! You can begin creating and developing better, more useful mental habits today – any time and any where.

    Consistency: Your Thought’s Friend

    Becoming a rider who feels confident in your own abilities to positively influence your horse, no matter the situation, requires practice. Regular, consistent practice of the right things.

    It’s only by doing this over and over again that you will begin seeing what perhaps initially felt difficult to practice, become easier – and over time become automatic. 

    Think about it this way: confident, successful riders don’t spend their entire ride thinking about their posture, their aids, or their balance. They have already devoted time to putting better habits on autopilot because they practiced the right things consistently until they became second nature.

    This simple fact then frees up their attention to focus on other things – usually how to become a more positive influence on their horse and developing how well they are working together. 

    Putting Better Habits on Autopilot – Now

    Ready to start changing your riding experience? Here’s a straightforward exercise to help you begin developing better mental habits:

    1. Identify a Trigger:

      Start by identifying one thing that consistently triggers a less-than-ideal reaction in your riding. It could be your horse speeding up, asking for a transition into canter, working over ground poles, your balance shifting unexpectedly, or even negative self-talk like “I’ll never get this right.”

    2. Visualize the Situation Clearly:

      Once you have identified one single thing to work on, imagine you’re watching a video of yourself riding.  Think Start your ‘video’ from a point where everything is going well. Then, let the “video” play until it reaches the moment when things start to go sideways. Watch closely. What exactly is happening?

    3. Slow Down the Replay:

      Replay your video again, but this time, slow everything down. Notice what physically changes right before things go wrong. Maybe you tense your shoulders, lean forward, hold your breath, or even start gripping with your knees.  The key here is to really get clear on exactly what you’re doing that causes things to go ‘sideways’.

    4. Think of Alternatives:

      Now, and this is important, intentionally think of different ways you could respond, use, or move your body in that situation. If you usually tense up, imagine yourself taking a deep breath, expanding through your body and then letting the tension release with it as you breath out.

      Maybe you know that just before transitions, you have a tendency to lean forward. This time, rather think about lengthening and elongating through your body. Imagine yourself sitting tall and balanced. You might even draw inspiration from another rider who handles similar situations confidently.

    5. Replace and Replay: Putting the Better Habits on Autopilot! 

      Now, once you have an alternative that works, begin replaying your mental video over again. But this time you’re replacing whatever it is that you usually do with a new, intentional response. I’m going to be honest, this can be difficult initially – take it slowly. One step at a time.

    Once you have it ‘created’ in your head, try to replay it a few times until it begins to feel ‘real’. This is where you are beginning to believe that it’s possible. And your mind must believe it if your body is to make it happen. 

    Struggle with Visualization?

    If visualization is challenging, don’t worry! There are other ways of making this happen.

        1. Write down the steps; like a story. What is now happening and then what you want to happen. The key is to add as much detail in here as possible.  Reread it over to yourself numerous times.
        2. Talk through the situation. I have found that talking to my horse helps here. Especially when I’m in the ‘thick of it’. I simply tell my horse what I usually do – in great detail. And then I begin telling them about what I’m going to do differently and change this time. I also include how this will play out or result in a different outcome for both of us. This has the added benefit of keeping you breathing as well!
        3. Watch an actual video of yourself doing the thing that you want to change. Then watch a video of another rider handing the same situation in a much more effective and positive way. Over time, from paying close attention to what the other rider is doing to get the better result, you will begin to change your actions as well.

    “But it ‘Feels’ Uncomfortable!” Good :)

    Here’s something crucial to remember: it’s okay to feel mentally uncomfortable as you go through this process. Honestly highlighting the parts of your riding that you’d rather keep hidden is not going to be easy or feel good! Mentally you might find yourself squirming! Embarrassed or frustrated are also common feelings to experience.

    However, that discomfort is just temporary—it won’t last forever. And it’s mental – not physical. What is exciting to realize is that feeling this way is a great indicator that you’re actually making progress!

    Hiding or burying all of the things that are holding you back as a rider is wasting your time – as well as your horses and your instructors! Be brave and face up to the things. Every rider has these things. Once you can see them for what they are – habits that are no longer serving you – you can let all of that shame or annoyance about them fade away.

    You’re simply choosing to replace outdated habits with ones that actually serve you at this point in your riding. 

    Your Action Step for Today

    Pick one trigger today and run it through this process. Commit just 10 minutes to intentionally practicing your new better habit to put on autopilot. Set a timer if it helps. The goal is to do this consistently, making these responses second nature and putting your mindset firmly on autopilot.

    Anything that you physically do that has a bit of a repetitive rhythm or sequence to it can really help this to stick for you.

    I find driving or walking to be great times to do this type of work. So too is mucking out, grooming, ironing, folding clothes, gardening… The options are endless. The question is, are you willing to do the work?

    Take the Next Step—Join the Waitlist!

    Ready to truly transform your riding experience? Make sure you pop your name onto the waitlist for the upcoming Returning to Riding Program. This is where you get to identify what’s going on with your riding (both what’s working and what’s not) and then begin working on ways to improve.

    The program is there to help you transform from being a passenger in the saddle, to showing up as a confident, consistent rider who can begin working on how to positively influence your horse.

    When you sign up for the waitlist, you’ll be the first to receive details about my exclusive new live webinar, designed to give you actionable insights and inspiration you can start using immediately. Join the Returning to Riding Waitlist HERE

    Happy Riding
    Lorna

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  • Are Your Outdated Expectations Ruining Your Riding Progress?

    Are Your Outdated Expectations Ruining Your Riding Progress?

    [fusebox_track_player url=”https://op3.dev/e/traffic.libsyn.com/dailystridespodcast/1232_Are_Your_Expectations_Ruining_Your_Riding.mp3″ title=”Are Your Outdated Expectations Ruining Your Riding?” social_linkedin=”true” social_pinterest=”true” social_email=”true” tweet_text=”Equestrian mindset workout on the podcast this week….” hashtag=”horsepodcast” twitter_username=”strides_success” ]

    Isn’t it amazing how so many riders just seem to ‘know’ what will happen each time they ride? They have certain expectations that, almost magically, seem to always come true for them. Unfortunately, the keywords in that sentence are ‘for them’.

    I see time and again how riders, regardless of what is really happening, will define each ride based on their beliefs and expectations.

    And, for most of these riders, these beliefs and expectations are simply untrue or unrealistic.  Meaning that they are creating a cycle where they simply repeat the same ride, the same month, the same year, over and over again with their horse.

    And all because they are unaware of how much their expectations are impacting their outcome.

    Creating an Invisible Bottleneck

    These often unknown and invisible beliefs can really play havoc with your progress as a rider. From becoming the underlying reason you lose motivation to actually go tack up, to help you feel a little like a prophet of doom where each ride is concerned!

    If you have been ‘trying’ to develop yourself or your horse – but have seen little to no success, I’m willing to bet that there is something going on in your head that has you both stuck

    The challenge is beginning to figure out what that is. When you begin to see your beliefs for what they really are – both conscious and subconscious – the work can begin. You can then begin to dismantle them and find new ways of thinking (and believing) that will actually serve you and your horse on your journey together.

    The Filter of an Expectation

    Having a certain belief or expectation is like putting colored goggles on. Anything you see will be affected by the lens of the goggles. It doesn’t matter where you see it, or when you see it – it is all through the colored goggle lense.

    When you believe or expect a certain thing to happen, you also see everything through the lens of that belief. It will literally color every experience you have – until you remove it.

    It can be frustrating to see riders ‘blame’ everything that happens with their horse on a certain belief that they have. Every unsuccessful schooling session. All of their areas need more work. Even random happenings and events become part of the story of their expectation!

    One of the best things you can do for yourself and your horse is to begin identifying these unhelpful expectations – and then begin dismantling them!

    Unable to See…

    Years ago I worked with a rider who struggled to keep her heels down. We are talking tippy tow ballerina style in the saddle. Any reminders, suggestions, or blatant ‘telling’ her to get more weight into the heel was met with excuses, objections, or the absolute instance that her heels were down.  She clearly thought I was blind!

    I suggested a video review session together – and during it, I noticed something.  She was literally latching on to every second of the video where her heels were down.  With an air of triumph, she would point out “Look, my heels are down”.

    Her mind was so invested in the belief that she was right, it wouldn’t allow her to see a clear truth – down for 5 seconds at random points when reminded, does not constitute ‘consistently down’!

    What Is Your Mind Looking For?

    Your mind wants to keep you safe.  And it also wants the path of least resistance.  When it can combine both of those things together, it feels like it’s winning!  Unfortunately, this is usually not the best combination for growth in our lives.

    Developing or getting better at something, growing, often requires us to become uncomfortable; and a lot of our beliefs try to prevent us from experiencing that unpleasant feeling!

    If you have found yourself saying something over and over again to do with your abilities as a rider, or your horse while being ridden – that needs to be examined! 

    Things like; “My horse always spooks when it’s windy”, or “my horse hates cantering, he always bucks”.  Seemingly harmless things like “I struggle to ride without stirrups”, or “my heels just won’t stay down”.   Or even things that may seem very true like “I don’t have time to actually train my horse” or “no matter how much we train, we don’t make progress”…

    All of the above statements started with a single thought which, for whatever reason, your brain decided was absolutely true – and it is now a belief for you and your riding. 

    And our minds look for ways to prove our beliefs correct.  Always.  They are ‘evidence gatherers’… They pay little attention to whether or not the thought is actually true anymore, but rather focus on proving or backing up the initial belief.

    Looking for Evidence

    Evidence can be many things.  It can be the sudden number of cars exactly like your new one on the road… Your mind ‘proving’ to itself that it did, indeed, make the right choice when purchasing the car.

    Evidence can also be failing to see the small progress you make each ride, in order to keep enforcing a story where you remain in the same place and therefore ‘safe’.  It can be looking for any sudden movement to ‘prove’ that your horse is indeed spooky.  Or any hint of an unbalanced step, or a difference of opinion in order to show you that your horse does indeed want to buck and throw you off…

    The fact of the matter is that whatever your mind believes, it will automatically – without hesitation – look for examples to strengthen that belief. 

    Some of this evidence will come from your own day-to-day experiences, and others will come from other riders.  It makes no difference.  Evidence is evidence… And it will all be used to strengthen the case for whatever belief you have when it comes to riding.

    Not All Expectations Are Bad

    Some expectations are fantastic and serve us so well.  I have seen riders who, purely because they believed they could, were able to do things that normally I would have said ‘wait for a little ‘too… And, they not only do them, but they also do them quite well.  Again, because they believe that they can.  Some people call this ‘beginners luck’.  Maybe it is – but it also works well at the moment :)

    Other riders simply believe that because they are training, they will improve.  They focus on looking for evidence of this – and is usually the case, they find it.

    I find that having positive expectations helps so much when working with riders and horses.  I feel that consciously bringing their attention to the ‘little wins’ helps to build confidence and momentum.

    However, I also spend a lot of time explaining that ‘what got you here, will rarely get you there’.  Meaning that just because this one thing works now, does not mean it will stay that way forever.

    It is so important to try and look at everything in your riding through unfiltered, unbiased, and unprejudiced eye. 

    Changing a Belief or Expectation

    To successfully change something, you have to first know it is there.  Become aware of it.  Go back to the stories you tell.  For me, a personal one the past few years involved time and commitments. To change this, so that regular riding once again became part of my day-to-day activities, I simply thought to myself “What is the opposite of this? What would that sound like?”.

    In my case, the opposite was “I am self-employed, I work from home, and I live on a horse farm – there is at least one opportunity each day to work with a horse”.

    Once I had the ‘statement’ or ‘thought’, I simply put my mind to work, consciously, to look for proof or evidence of this.  

    Now, initially, it took quite a bit of diligence and consistency on my part.  My mind clearly believed that it was much better for me to believe the old thought!  However, each time I caught myself actually speaking something to prove that old belief, I change it.  I simply changed the words coming out of my mouth… From there, I put my mind to task regarding creating a story around this new thought.  One that felt ‘real’ and ‘true’.

    Remember, our minds are a tool we can use to improve our life.  However, if you just let it run on autopilot, your life will probably either stay the same – or detoriate! 

    Creating Lasting Change

    At the moment, this current new belief is serving me well.  I am still aware enough of it to consciously look for opportunities to ‘prove’ it or find evidence for it.  And my mind has also begun to subconsciously do the same.  Not always, but I have noticed a few occasions!

    I really do believe that, in your riding, if you are allowing your mind to run on autopilot, you are doing both yourself and your horse a disservice. 

    Be aware of the words you are saying about your riding, your horse, and your journey together.  Always second-guess them.  “Is this actually true for me right now in this moment?” is often a good question to ask yourself.

    Don’t simply accept everything you think as the truth…  Ask to be shown evidence ‘for’ the stuff you want.  Give your mind a job and ask it to ‘prove this for me’…

    Being aware of this one simple thing as the power to change everything for you and your horse…

    Happy Riding
    Lorna

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