There’s always that rub when you realise that what got you here is not the thing that’s going to get you there. The big issue is usually that what got you to this point, here, now feels comfortable and familiar. Easy even. And so many of us, myself included, just want to double down on these things to get further. Now, sometimes that works, you will see a little progress… But almost always that progress will stall – and you will inevitably find yourself beginning to go backwards as you ‘effort’ even harder!
Learning to identify what needs to change is really important in riding and in life – and becoming okay with the concept of letting go, no matter how uncomfortable that feels, is often the key to allowing the change to happen.
The initial burst of enthusiasm and motivation we feel when we decide to move to the next level as a rider will, unfortunately, be short-lived. However, when you are honest enough with yourself to understand that there will be a ‘messy middle’, you can be more self-aware when you get there, so that you can consciously navigate it with the least hassle possible.
Letting Go to Level Up
Any time you set yourself a goal to reach a new level as a rider, there will be a gap between where you are and where you want to be regarding skills, level, knowledge, abilities, resources, etc. It’s that gap that you have to close to reach your goal. And in order to close that gap, you will need to do something differently. Which seems fine when it’s said like that, right?
The challenge arrives when we begin to believe that the thing or situation we are currently experiencing or have is essential – and we become unwilling to think or do anything different.
But it makes sense that changing or dropping things is the key. For example, if you were a novice rider who found that using the more ‘obvious aids’ of legs and hands made your communication with your horse easier… It would make sense that you would think this is the way to continue to reach the next level of your riding and your horse’s training, right? Wrong! To reach the next level, you will need to refine your aids from the obvious to the subtle – seat, weight, mind, thoughts, etc.
You will have to let go or be willing to change what worked up to this point, to reach the new point in your riding – and that can feel scary, uncomfortable, and counterintuitive!
You’re Not Just Adding Skills
Imagine that each new skill you learn as a rider is a package. When you began riding, you had no packages. Your arms are wide open, keen to begin collecting these packages that will make all the difference to you and your riding. And as you progressed, you began accumulating packages. Soon, you will reach a point where you have quite a few packages. Which is fine – until it’s not.
Because when you want to level up, you need new skills. New packages. And this will require you to put a past package or two down so you can pick up a new package. Swap an old ‘method’ or belief for a new one.
Here’s a good example. I bet that earlier in your riding journey, you realised there was a direct correlation between the degree your heels are down and the frequency you fall off. More down usually equals fewer falls! So, it makes sense that you will work to get your heels down and keep them there! However, forcing your heels down might just be what’s holding you back from reaching a new level of skills…
And because you were so committed to doing something one way, means that it will feel uncomfortable or ‘different’ when you suddenly begin doing it a different way. Welcome to the messy middle!
Using Self-Awareness to Win
This is where your level of self-awareness will play a big role. If you simply hurtle along through your riding journey, with no real understanding of what’s going on, it will take longer and feel harder than it needs to be! But if you already know, when you make your decision to level up your skills, this makes the transition period much easier.
When you know to expect a ‘messy middle’ on your way to levelling up, you can begin to put systems and ‘rules’ in place to help buffer for it when it comes. You can also work through it much more quickly.
So how will you know when you’re in the thick of the ‘messy middle’? The following might begin to happen or start happening more frequently:-
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- Your horse’s way of going is not as ‘pretty’ as it was
- Your abilities seem to have gone backwards
- The communication between you and your horse is jumbled
- You feel frustrated at not being able to do something
- You feel like you’re ‘trying harder’ but getting nowhere
- The overall standard seems to revert back to a previous version!
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For many riders, when they hit this part of the journey but don’t realise it, they throw in the towel and give up. However, when you know that it is coming, you can plan for it. Find the right people to help guide you through the challenges. Maybe that is a trainer, coach, group of riders, or online community…
You can also notice the specific places the challenges are showing up – the triggers – and learn more about what needs to be uplevelled from this.
What Are You Holding Onto?
So, back to the original concept for this episode, letting go to level up… Have you experienced this in your riding and training? And if so, what did you do? Hold on (and remain stuck)? Or allow yourself to embrace the messy middle and use it as insight into what needs to shift in your riding or approach to riding?
Letting go can feel scary. But remember, you can always go back if needs be. However, if you are to really allow your nervous system to upgrade to the new level you want to ride at, learning how to be ‘okay’ with letting go is a big step towards that!
Happy Riding
Lorna
Want Support While You Do This?
Inside Connection, are dedicated to working on the 5 essentials, the keys to refining all the training elements we just talked about. It’s exactly where your progress begins again.
If this episode made you squirm a little, and wonder “…is she talking about me…?”, then Connection is exactly where you need to be! Join us for the Half Halt Training at:- https://stridesforsuccess.com/join
Online Training & Coaching
The Your Signature Ride Challenge
Here’s the idea: you use only your seat and leg aids to “write” your name in the arena. Sounds simple, right? But what it really does is sharpen your awareness of timing and clarity. You’ll learn when your aids actually make a difference. And you’ll have fun doing it. All while creating a pattern that’s uniquely yours!
You can sign up by CLICKING HERE
It’s free to join, and every rider who participates gets access to a guided audio lesson to help them through the challenge. Plus, you’ll have a chance to win 3 months inside Connection (a $66 value)
Restart & Reschool
And if you would like a little more 1-to-1 coaching, explore Restart & Reschool Private Coaching. It is perfect if you’re starting your practice – or if you’re looking to turn your existing practice into something ‘real’ for you and your horse. I’ll guide you step by step on the way! You’ll not only get the full ‘OTTB; From Racetrack to Ready Program’, but also fornightly private lessons with me to move you forward in your riding.
We can work on anything you would like; from groundwork, to lunging, to riding, to jumping… With the virtual private lessons, we can do all of these things – and more. If you would like to find out me, you can let me know a little more about you HERE, and I will then reach back out, and we can chat!
This is the support, training, and accountability you’ve been missing to finally follow through and start seeing progress. No fluff. No overwhelm. And as flexible as you need for your lifestyle.
Connect with Lorna online:-
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- Connect in the Daily Strides Podcast Online Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/dailystridespodcast
- Connect with Lorna on Instagram @lornaleeson or @stridesforsuccess
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